Wednesday, June 6, 2007

"they found themselves just floating free, from all responsibility...without the weight of being whole, some fruits evolved all on their own" -mirah

i'm having creators block. it's come on in full force. i'm so dang sleepy - i can barely move my legs and it feels like june just showed up out of nowhere. i'm not exactly sure if may was ever here, it happened so fast. drained. all the creative juice i'm made of has drained right through the tips of my toes while i was in my sleepy daze. i've tried alot of my old tricks to find my missing piece. (p.s. i'm not really sure what it is i'm supposed to be creating in the first place? but the lack of inspiration is killing me!)i bought some new music. both feist cd's. and the new jeff buckley compilation. i bought a new pattern book. i've browsed the little fabric shop uptown. i've cruised barnes and noble for a good book. i've taken a long drive. i've twirled around outside. i've eaten yummy-tasty food. i've kissed my andrey good. yet i'm still just yawning through the days. i've sat in front of this computer nightly and stared blankly at this blogger screen. nothing. it's reminding of the last time that this happened to me large enough for me to remember. i was living in seattle with G-love. the rainy somber days would have had any other normal artist locked to the art table. i was not. my trash can was full of half creations. my creative block hit rock bottom when even the *SALE* signs i'd color on the white board at 24 hour fitness were blah. G tried to save me. i came home from work one day and she'd set up a little cove for me in our one bedroom apartment. she put up my art table that had been stowed away due to my lack ability. gathered up every piece of art supplies she could find in our box of a house and hung inspiring posters on the wall. she sat me down determined to help me find the "missing synapse in my brain" that's what we called it. we bought sombreros and did a "karma" dance in our living room to good music. and i'm pretty sure it helped because since then, this is the first time i've felt this frustrated-empty.
in the mean time...i've been writing lists. lists of things i want to buy. things i want to do. things i need help with. ideas i have but don't know where to begin. things i want to make when i feel able again. here is my list. in no particular order:

*i want to know how to make these rings i found in the sundance catalog or atleast know someone that does
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*i want to breathe in some seattle rain
*i want lukey to have these shoes
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*i want 48 fresh primsacolor markers
*i want a button maker
*i want a long drive with 25 new itunes songs i've never heard before
(dear allyson- i'm pretty sure that you need to just send me your ipod because i'm in love with the 5 songs you shared with me and i'm ready for more.)
*i want to know what to do with these?
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*i want people to know that
"war is not healthy for children and other living things"
*i want a room with walls to paint on
*i want one lucas free hour to sit and eat cheesecake
with ash and really learn of her
*i want bumper stickers for this since i accidently threw away the tail-lights and license plate it was supposed to have
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*i want 3/4 a yard of this long lost fabric:
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so i can make this:
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*i want to know how to quilt this? i've never quilted before. machine or hand and i don't know where to begin. it's just sitting there. with all of it's pieces. waiting.
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*i want a magic way to lose these last baby belly pounds
*i want to know where joey v. is
*i want to teach birth classes
*i want to go to a "sale yard" with amy and reno and find an arm chair
*i want someone to show me how to re-upholster an arm chair
*i want to dance with andrey
*i want inspiration. period.

can you help me check any of these off my list? please?! anybody out there?
a reward will be issued to anyone with information on the whereabouts of my creativity. you know where to find me.


  1. I have MANY ideas for those dressers!!! I absolutely LOVE re-finishing furniture and making them come alive again!! I also feel a lack in the TIME to be creative. I have a million things I want to do also and no time to do them. I have, however, been putting all I have into our adoption profile to be seen by our next child's birthmom...whoever she may be! Nothing more important than that!

    Call or e-mail me. I will help!

    Love you!

  2. Hey Lindsay this is your az cousin Cathy. I found you blog on Maren's and have been reading. I love to hear your words. You remind me of you mom! Anyway as I was reading your list, I thought, "Wow she can come to my house and take care of half(or more)of her list!!" Just wanted to say hi and let you know how much I enjoy reading what you have to say! Love ya oh and tell you fam hi!

  3. hi cathy! i love that you read my silly blog! welcome! it won't let me into yours though ? =(!! i would love to come to arizona and spend a day letting you girls help me with my projects. i don't know where to begin!!

  4. Yes Lin, come to AZ and that will take care of your long trip you want to take...And then you can show me how to sew and then maybe that will get your creative juices flowing out of your pores!

  5. Interesting, even when you are lacking inspiration, you still inspire me. How can I help, I wish I could? Trying to think of what I do when artist block hits, drink some Diet Mountain Dew?

    No ipod for me : ( just itunes on my computer. I have a sister who has tons of music and I get to borrow things from her, she is very generous. Newest borrow: Pieta Brown and it's growing on me.

  6. My little Lindsay – wish I had 1/10 of the creative brain power you have…. really wish you could meet me for lunch at Noodles today.
    to steal a little something from R.E.M.-
    it’s these little things, they can pull you under
    live your live filled with joy and wonder
    I always knew this altogether thunder
    was lost in our little lives
    oh, oh but sweetness follows
    oh, oh but sweetness follows
    please – go for a picnic in cottonwood canyon – take advantage of the sights, sounds, smells, and beauty of being in utah in the summer! make a different list – 5 things you are grateful for…..i love you, amy

  7. Lin I have the leftover fabric from my diaper bag, it looks like that only blue, I have the one that matches it too, maybe you could use them together. I know I'm not "gifted" so that may sound really dumb, I've got an itch to do my bedroom lately but I was born with artist block, we'll see if anything happens.

  8. So I totally remember the Karma dance.. it was one of our best days in Seattle I would have to say, wish I would have kept my sombrero though to pull out for some good times. I think you need to take a vacation to California.. there are all sorts of creative minds, it actually reminds me of being in Seattle just something about it that makes you want to be creative. I saw this girl today doing all sorts of cool hula hoop stuff.. and I thought to myself.. how do you even come up with a talent like that? The good news is that I have actually made a few quilts so I could be of help there for you.

  9. thanks for the love guys. daish, when can you come help me with these furnitures? serious. maren, come over! oh allyson!-how can you help me? where do i begin? how do i edge this quilt, for starters. if i could just spend the day with you i sure i could learn enough to fill buckets full of beautiful things! my amy love- thank for changing my mind up a bit. things i am grateful for...that list will be here soon. happy-having-a-friend-over =). amelia dear-how much of that fabric do you have left? that's very indian-giver of me...but i'm hungry for it! i can't find that fabric anywhere...which means your diaper bag is priceless in the silly crafter world that i live in. gina dawn - it just dawned on me what we did with your sombrero. that silly weirdo took you for all you had! i'll get you a new one. jon will love to do a karma dance, i'm sure!
    love, lin

  10. Lindsay -

    Thanks so much for visiting me and commenting on my quilt. Well, it's someone elses now :(! That quilt looks very great minds think alike. I am having problems motivating myself right now. I want to do so many things, but there is just no time. I want to make my girls some pretty dresses with some pretty fabric right now. And I would like to find some very cool chairs to slipcover. Something will pop in soon!

  11. I know what you can do with those cute pieces of furniture: send them to ME! They are great. I'm sure you'll find the perfect use for them, or fix them to your liking. Sarah Schuller