"life in slow motion" - david gray

my life has suddenly taken on a slow motion shift this week. it's sort of refreshing and calming and comfy. the manic that usually greets me each morning - the trying to find something to do, something to make, somewhere to go, someone to meet has been replaced with a sense of happy and calm in just holding still. satisfied to spend the days tucked in at home with my boy. we venture out only for the cheese and whipping cream i forgot at the grocery store or the occasional tall-peppermint-hot-chocolate (in a red holiday cup, puh-lease) or to check the mail.

i slowly straighten up the house as the day goes on. boy is learning to pick up the train set before we get out the box of animals. the blocks put away before the crayons come out. we tell stories and laugh and he asks "how's your day, mom" (this whole mom. dad. thing is new.)

see, this shift has caused a change in him, too. he's much more content to spend the day at home creating block towers/swirly paintings/pretend rice birthday cakes than he is riding around strapped to the carseat trying to hold still/be good/shhhhh!






the sun has begun to go down around three-ish which is cause for the perfect afternoon snuggle and rest. we've been reading welcome with love, a book borrowed from ginger the midwife and bouncing name ideas off of each other.
"how 'bout baby charlie, that's a good one, mom!"
"that is a good one! how about baby milo? lucas and his little brother, milo or harper or leo?" i bounce back as we fold and re-fold our pile of wee baby clothes and the cuuuuute baby sockies. we climb out of our cozy nest just in time to finish cleaning up the house and start dinner on the stove before we hear andrey's key in the door.

call it nesting.
call it a change coming on in the seasons.
call it peaceful.
call it a welcomed shift.

"a son's gonna rise in a mile. in a mile you'll be feelin' fine" - citizen cope

the hugeness of it all - 28 weeks {a picture for ashlee}

um. yes. why hello, third trimester.
i remember you.
my aching hips.
the tossing and turning trying to catch just a wink of good sleep.
bumping into things with the hugeness of this very-much-there belly.
the rush of things i've got left to do.
oh my! do i have alot left to do.

it's all sort of snuck up on me. the hustle and bustle of chasing that boy and the daily living we've been doing has sort of masked the months ticking by and all of a sudden... this new boy will be making his grand debut in a mere matter of weeks.
it's different this time. this birth year. looking back on my months of growing a lucas bean, i've realized that i was a bit naive. the reality of his birth story has yet to settle in me. and i'm going to spend the next few months diving deep into that.
this babe will have his own story. i'm anxious to learn of it. and a whole big bit of scared, too. i've been careful to notice each growing milestone this time around, checking them off one by one very cautiously. much more aware that each passing week that is still spent growing babe is a blessing. a big huge blessing.

and here we are.
i can imagine it now.
imagine tiny boy feets.
the fresh smell of new baby snuggled up to me.
a hungry little nursling.
wrapped up in blankets i've made for only him.
his handsome name.

i am sad that weeks four through twenty-eight have sort of whizzed by in a blur and the tiny blip of moment that this boy will share here safely with me has passed without enough time to relish in it.
i love this gift i've been given. this child bearing gift.
the hugeness of it all.

goodnight loves, lin

"i'll love you more than anybody can" - peter, paul and mary

the only trace of her this morning was a stack of clean dishes by my sink, a cold diet 7-up in my fridge (i'm pretty sure that one was by accident) and a little lukey boy with a sad lip missing his grammy.


****
what i know for sure:
that a girl should not live a gazillion {648 to be exact} miles away from her mama.

goodnight loves,
lin

****

{this image and more obama goodies found here}

happy. proud. excited. hopeful.
more on last nights festivities later...