i've been bombarded the past few days with images from the tragic happenings in virginia. it's everywhere. even when we tried to avoid all the media about it this time. tired of hearing about this kind of stuff. tired of the haunting images. tired of this violence. last night in my insomniatic channel flipping it kept flashing in front of me. the bad guy. his pictures, his story, the videos. that lost look in his eyes. he scared me. bad. i'd close my eyes and try to sleep and i kept seeing him and hearing the story.
and i just wondered how it all could have been different if he'd let somebody love him. i looked at my baby boy cuddled up to me. i want to love him so good. i never want him to feel that darkness. that bittercold loneliness. how do i do that? i'm so thankful that i'm alive. that i survived that fight. lived to know what it feels like to be safely loved. to know what it's like to have a babe of my own who fills my life with overwhelming sunshine. my heart is full this night. it aches a bit for the people in virginia that have just begun their new grieving adventures. because grief is so very powerful too. but i guess...that we all just keep on living right? i mean, what else do we do?