tonight i found this:
and now i know where she's been.
for four days
i'd been careful with how i was wording my prayers.
not wanting to be selfish with my pleading.
we want her here.
we need her here.
but i don't want to keep her here,
if she needs to go.
on my knees.
it's time to come back.
i cried. i begged.
i stopped the car and made andrey pray some more.
gina doesn't belong to me.
she is made of the earth.
the red dirt of sedona.
the salt of the california tide.
she is the giant sequoias of the redwood forest.
she is the concert echo on a late night in park city.
the giggle of two best friends, grown old together.
i believe she teetered and then decided to stay